Years ago I saw myself settling for a relationship that would have proven financially stable, but that would not have been a mostly happy one. IN fact it was pure misery. Everyone saw me unhappy and tried to intervene...but I thought I needed that financial stability to be ultimately happy. I could have what I needed in life through money and nice things... right.
I was so wrong. My life was a constant inner struggle (okay here I go- I'm laying it all out here). I thought I was doing what I was supposed to do, find a provider, get a degree, then get a career get married, and after working myself ragged- try to have some kids and raise them in a daycare. No offense to those who this works for, but for me that was what people were telling me to do, not what I wanted. All I wanted was love. That butterflies-in-your-stomach, I-can't-stop-thinking-about-him, need-to-be-with-both-day-and-night, want-him-to-hold-me-oh-so-tight, intense, infinite, unconditional kind of love. The kind of love I have.
I've been told you can't be best friends with your significant other, that there is no such thing as "unconditional love", that people cheat and you learn to forgive...basically I've heard these horrors, and lies and was lead to believe them. Love is not any of that-I first learned that in the Bible, as well as in my beloved Fairy Tales, and after some difficult relationships... I learned it for myself. (and yes. I have been told those things verbatim. In relationships. For real)
So how can it be that I am now here, from there? I'm not really quite sure. But his place that I'm in...this real-world "Märchen"... it's incredible. I'm so far from where I thought I'd be five years ago. But I am in a place where even though we live on less than many families we are happy, and have what we need. Love.
Love, love, love. All you need is love. Lennon was right. And I know, with our love...anything is possible.
So now, it's time to have a date-night. Our favorite thing to do: Take a picnic and watch the sunset. And that doesn't cost much more than a meal and a bit of gas...I pray, every night and every day with every fiber in my body, and every ounce of energy in my soul that the world can know a love like ours...I know that if the world had love it would be an amazing place of beauty and light.